Book Review: The Rose and the Thistle

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I enjoyed the journey through the Great Britain terrain as I invested my time in Blythe and Everard’s lives. I enjoyed reading Laura Fraztz’s The Rose and the Thistle. In the early 1700s, the political scene was in disaccord. A duke’s daughter and a Scottish laird are thrust into living arrangement, which brings about discontentment on both sides. 

Frantz weaves a touching tale of wealth and position in uncertain days. 

She entices the reader to turn the pages by developing both the main and minor characters’ identities. While Blythe’s family’s behavior caused me to root for her survival, I found myself desiring to learn how Everard’s greedy and unruly brother’s actions would affect his family. 

I am not well versed in the governing aspects of this time period in Great Britain. The crucial setting of this novel required me to explore the era and the colloquialisms. Thus, slowing down the adventure at times. 

Laura Frantz’s descriptive words bring to life the countryside, costumes, and castles as well as  the deep emotions of the character’s grief for loved ones, loyalty to family, and fears of the future. I found myself transported in time, wanting to discover Blythe and Everard’s destiny. 

I received a complimentary copy of this book from Revell Publishing through the Revell Read blogger program. The opinions expressed are my own.

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Book Review: Her Heart’s Desire

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     Her Heart’s Desire by Shelley Shepard Gray follows four Amish girls, Mary Margaret, Lilly, Betsy and Esther on a Florida vacation; one that will change their lives.

    The main character Mary Margaret is a wallflower, who has been bullied all her life. She is delighted when she quickly makes two friends on the trip. But the arrival of a fourth girl will require Mary Margaret to look at her past with eyes of forgiveness, which she must rely on God to help her with. In the midst of all the girl fun, charming Jayson makes his way into her life. She falls quickly in love, but discovers Jayson has a secret that could keep them apart. 

     This was the first Amish romance I have read. It was a sweet story. I loved how the sheltered girls were in awe of everything they weren’t accustomed to. As potential suitors entered the scene, their innocence was delightful. The author did a great job ending each chapter with a little something to make you want to read on.

    However, I felt several aspects of the story were not deep. Mary Margaret’s past experiences had clearly affected her in a huge way, but we only saw a small glimpse of the details of her past. Also, the love story moved at an unrealistic pace. Each problem that arose seemed to be solved too quickly.

While I prefer a book with more adventure and struggles, if you are looking for a sweet, light, quick read, this book is for you. I would highly recommend this book to a young adult audience, rather than an adult audience.

I received a complimentary copy of this book from Revell Publishing through the Revell Read blogger program. The opinions expressed are my own.

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Unknown Paths: Planned Panicking-By Karla

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Planned Panicking

I tend to worry. Over the years when a family went to the hospital, my sister Gail and I would share our concerns. Often, we fed on each other’s worries. She would say something like “what if it is or that …?” Then I would contribute, adding worse scenarios. 

On our worst panicking days, this exchange of woes continued back and forth for a while. At some point, we laughed, referring to our frets as planned panicking. We thought, if we prepared for the worst and the worst came true, we would not have far to fall with our emotions, thinking it was the best way for us to handle the stress of the trials of life.

The Unknown

Unknown Path

For me, my most difficult trials are usually the ones that accompany a large unknown element, which leave me wondering: what, when, where, and how.

The unrevealed path looms ahead, and I struggle with navigating it. Thus, planned panicking seems to help. I visualize, directing myself through the worst-case scenario, knowing I could walk anything pertaining to it. 

None of us can live without facing trials. Perhaps, these trials are as simple as spilling something on your shirt right before a big meeting or being late due to traffic. Other times, the trials can be life altering: loss, illness, death, finances, betrayal, moves, disappointment, and unwanted change.

Hardships require us to make some choices, whether we want to or not. The bigger the trial, the bigger the effects on our lives. If we stand still, the tidal wave of change can knock us over. So, I see two choices. 

World’s Way or God’s Way

Looking for a path, the world’s way will often tell us to hate our way through, find revengeful actions to retaliate, or perhaps reach for a substance to deal with the pain. We can easily view these choice actions in response to the daily hits of the situation. Click on the television, look at social media, check-out the headlines on magazines.

We can also allow sadness to develop into depression. Satan loves this worldly way, and he is good at throwing exaggerations our way: it is always or it will never. These falsehoods can throw us into a tornado of negative thinking, which can be dangerously difficult to recover from. 

God’s way is more difficult to find because it is hidden among overgrown weeds of this world. However, if we push back the briars, we can find His hand. Then unknowns become less frightening. 

While our world changes rapidly, God never changes. He wants to comfort, strengthen, and guide us. His principles are timeless; His ways bring healing and peace. 

Planned Preparation 

I am thankful that along the bumpy roads of our lives, Gail and I have matured in our faith. His goodness was, is, and will always be. He is there to hold us when we cry, help us stand again, and light the path ahead. Still, while we cannot understand all the whys of this world, God’s guidance allows us to navigate the way we should walk the unexplainable paths His way, helping with the whens, wheres, whats, and hows.  

Abiding in His Word helps prepare for the rains and storms. Seeking Godly wisdom from sound-Christian friends, provides an earthly crutch through the debris of the trials. Making a mental or written list of how He has carried me through previously troubled times, builds my confidence, allowing trust to breed and take flight over hardships. Planned preparation is not as easy as planned panicking because it takes time, but it brings peace!

God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in troubles. Psalms 46:1

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Receiving Is Better, Sometimes -By Karla

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Mom taught me that it is better to give than receive. Perhaps, when it comes to talking and listening, this is not so.

Giving Instructions to Others

When I was a mom of young children, they liked to tell me how to play and what to do. “Mommy, sit here and put this dress on my Barbie.” When I looked at them with my Mama face, they would add, “please”. Of course, I happily did as they asked. They enjoyed giving me instructions. But they did not always like receiving mine. 

Loosely Receiving Instructions from Others

“Girls, five more minutes and then we need to leave,” was not even heard at times. “Pick up your toys, please,” was weakly acknowledged with a weak okay. Then my words went out of their ears just like it did with my little ears when my mom spoke similar words. They much preferred giving the instructions rather than hearing them. Following my directives, that was an entirely different situation.

Loosely Receiving Instructions from God

Isn’t that the way we are with God’s instructions sometimes? We hear His word on Sunday mornings, but it often goes out the other ear on Monday through Saturday. Most of the time, we have good intentions, but our follow through is lacking. 

As my girls grew, I tried to encourage open communication between us. Some days they clammed up, but more often they were JabberJaw (the cartoon character from the 70’s), and I couldn’t get a word in edgewise.

When I reflect on my relationship with God, I realize that I am similar to my  girls and JabberJaw. I’d much rather talk to God than to listen to Him. I pray more often than I read His word, giving Him my list of wants and needs like He is a genie. 

To give myself a little credit, I will ask Him for guidance at times and ponder for a while. But time after time, I go on my merry little way, usually because I want a quick resolution. His instructions for a better life are found in His word, and He continues to wait. 

Probably, I am an eighty/twenty percent girl. I talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk, and only listen, listen. How prideful am I that I could think God should listen to me more than I should be listening to Him.

I need a balance! 

That’s what I need to do. Find the time to be still and know that He is God. In His omniscience, He knows best for all my needs and for all my wants.  

spiral notebook and bible on white textile
Photo by Tara Winstead on Pexels.com

Yes, I believe there are many times when it is better to receive than to give. God cares for us so much that He desires for us to spend time with Him. So, let’s sit and rest in His love. Read His words. Listen, and receive His wisdom.

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Listen Closely: Misheard words -Karla

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Dick Clark’s American Bandstand aired Saturday afternoons after Tarzan swung from vine to vine. (Check out our Tarzan blog entitled Solid Rock.) We listened closely to the new songs that debuted.

Long before music videos or the commonality of people going to concerts, American Bandstand gave people a chance to watch musical groups perform. I chuckled when Dick Clark would gather a couple of dancers and ask them to rank a song and explain their thoughts.

Week after week songs received high marks. “It had a good beat. It was easy to dance to.” These words were repeated so often that my sisters and I often mocked the phrase as it rolled off the tongue of the various guests.

Bad Girls

Different hairbrushes; different ages; same crazy us!

One of the songs that had a great beat to dance to was Donna Summer’s “Bad Girls”. When that beat-bopping song was released in 1979, I was only 12 and Donna 13. When together, we sang along in hair brushes while dancing around. In those days, a person could not look up lyrics easily. In fact, like many others, we often made up our own lyrics that somewhat made sense. When we could not think of any words that fit, we just hummed or dropped out for a bit, dancing on.

Fast forwarding about 40 years later, Donna and I were indulging ourselves with Baskin Robbins ice creams, which is one of our favorite past times. We licked and laughed, listening to some oldies while in the car. Donna Summer’s Bad Girls began blurring. In a flash of realization I said, “Oh, my! I think those whistles were cops! Donna! What kind of bad girls are they?”

With the handy, dandy internet, we peered wide-eyed at the lyrics we had been singing all those years! 

While You Were Sleeping

Isn’t that the way it is with many things. We just go bebopping along, not truly realizing what we are saying and doing. Often we are oblivious to how our momentary lifestyle affects our current lives and its long-term consequences.

If you have read some of our blogs, you know how much we love music. I relate to lyrics and their melodies often. Over the Christmas Holidays I heard the Casting Crowns’ song, While You Were Sleeping. It tells of how the town Bethlehem had no room and slept through Jesus’ birth. The writers share about his death on the cross while so many did not pay attention to the magnitude of the event on the third day. The final two stanzas focus on America. The song claims the obvious misplacement of our attention. When the Groom comes for His bride so many will be ignorant to the depths of His love and sacrifice. 

Read and listen to the Word, for when you listen to the Word, you are listening to your God.

Listen Closely

January is the month when millions declare their commitment to their health. We vow to eat better and exercise more. Should we not want more than physical renewal? 

We should commit to listening closely to God’s word, not just hearing and enjoying it, like the beat of Donna Summer’s song. Our world is filled with noise, which makes it difficult to listen to what we need to focus on. Like our misunderstanding of Bad Girls‘ lyrics, we may not fully understand what we are hearing because we are not truly studying what is being said.

John 1:1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

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Trust: How Daddy Taught Me-by Donna

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My daddy loved cars and everything about them. In fact, he worked for Ford Motor Company for nearly forty years and restored many antique Ford cars. He taught me to drive both manuals and automatics. Daddy taught me how to drive and I trust his ways.

I remember the first time I drove alone. It was raining and dark outside. I asked my mama if I could go meet my friend. 

Her face said it all. Rain, dark, dangerous…. 

“Please?” I asked with pleading eyes.

So getting a second opinion, she asked my daddy what he thought about it. 

“Well I reckon she knows where the lights and windshield wipers are; don’t she?” He was not being a smarty britches; he was being funny. But, he was confident in my ability since he had instructed me.

Dukes of Hazzard Driving Style

All these years later, I still consider myself a good driver. Truth be known, if I wasn’t, Karla and I would no longer be on Earth. There have been several times when I had to resort to a “Dukes of Hazzard” driving style, which saved us. 

For example, once we were lost in the middle of the night. (Truth be known, that happened more than one time) We were 18 and 19 year- old-college students, but neither of us had ever driven in downtown Atlanta. We were so off-course! No cell phones or GPS, and the one-way-streets were a nightmare! At one point, I was irritated at being lost and driving way too fast. When all of a sudden, in the darkness, a huge ROAD CLOSED barrier appeared. I slammed on the brakes, bringing us to a stop in a sliding, digging, and spraying ice hockey style. We sat silently in shock for a moment, caught our breaths, and then moved on. 

I Trust my Ability

In 1989, when I began my teaching career, I bought a brand new Ford Mustang, fresh off the assembly line. I have purchased several used cars since with all of these being ten or more years old. Two years ago I bought my second ever brand-new car. It is a Chevrolet. Sorry Daddy, it was a better price than the Ford. 

My new car has lots of whistles and bells: BlueTooth, keyless entry, automatic lights. But, the most important luxury to me is the ability to crank it from inside my house on a cold winter day! I was all excited about the features, except one, the backup camera. My daddy taught me to drive in reverse by looking over my shoulder.

For twenty-seven years of my adulthood, I had a really long driveway through the woods. I would put my car in reverse and drive as fast as I could up the drive, just for fun. My three kids would laugh, feeling it was like a backward ride at the fair. I know I was never endangering them; I trusted my ability. But with a backup camera, the manufacturer expects me to trust them. I am supposed to peer at a screen and backup without really looking. I don’t think so! That is not how Daddy taught me.

Trusting is a Slow Process

During the first six months, when I would back up, anyone who rode with me would say, “Why don’t you use your backup camera?” 

My response, “I don’t trust it.”

While I do use it now, it was a slow process. Anytime I went in reverse, the screen on the dash automatically showed me the view behind the car, whether I wanted it to or not. My eyes couldn’t help but glance in its direction. Eventually I gave in. It took a little getting used to, but now I like it. I can even see when I am backing out of a parking space and I am beside a mile-long SUV. It gives me a little view of the side before I can see it. 

When Karla and I go to Florida every summer, we take turns with our cars. This past July, we took hers. (It is a Ford, Daddy would be proud.) Even when we take her vehicle, I am always the driver, and she is the navigator, music selector, temperature regulator, food finder, and much more.

The first time I backed up, I immediately looked at the camera, which was NOT there. I felt lost! It was bizarre. I almost didn’t trust my own eyes to look over my shoulder, even though I had trusted my capability for decades. What if there is something I can’t see, the camera always knows. Right? Yes,The camera sees all.

I thought of how this scenario is like trusting God. You go through life doing it your way. It’s comfortable, and you trust yourself. But when you finally learn to trust God, the manufacturer of each of us, it is such a relief. You know He sees what you can’t. And those moments when you fall back into your old way and don’t fully rely on Him, you will feel lost. 

If you have not learned to trust God in your daily walk you have a new year ahead of you. It may seem foreign at first, but you will soon realize, you can depend on him. He’s got your back. And you will never want to be without him again.

“For we live by faith, not by sight.” 2 Corinthians 5:7 (NIV)

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Freeze Frame -By Karla

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It is fun to open photo albums seeing all the memories come to life. Amid its pages, a person might find freeze frames of the first, wobbly steps taken toward mom, puckered lips blowing out candles, a dribbling ball in midair, a slinging fishing line headed toward the water, an open mouth with fried chicken on its way inside, a winner holding his trophy, or the precious smiles posing with a loved one for the final time.

A freeze-frame photo is a type of still image. This particular kind of picture holds an action in place, freeze framing it, to preserve the moment. These shots are generally used for a purpose. These freeze frames often unleash the background story that floods our minds, producing grins, laughs, or sometimes tears. 

Freeze Frame Memories

\1986 Success

God created us with the ability to freeze frame memories in our minds as well. While I am an extremely visual person, I believe most have the capability to close our eyes and create a home movie of a past event. Seeing my daughters ride bikes with their hair blowing in the wind brings cheer to my empty-nesting heart. What a blessing memories can be to us in needed times. 

However, life does not just consist of happy moments. In fact, life is made of mountains and valleys, highs and lows. At times, I have captured some painful freeze frames in my mind and held them too tightly. Opening the envelope to discover my devastating SAT scores in 1985 seemed to shatter my college dreams, or the doctor sharing I had breast cancer. Those pictures and movies have the potential to smother a person in bitterness and harness him in pain. If not careful, a person can allow these negative freeze frames to leave him trapped in a dark room with the walls closing in. How does the person not get stuck in the muck of these moments?

Replacing Negatives

God allows us to replace our scarred freeze frames with ones that regenerate us. We can tear the negatives into pieces by praying and asking God to replace them. Allowing God to divert my thoughts from the letter that stated my horrible scores to the kind counselor who showed me an alternate route toward my dream of becoming a teacher. And the doctor’s words informing me that I had cancer? God reminds me of my camping trip. I sat on the scratchy, nylon-woven chair and watched the fluffy clouds drift in the big, blue sky. God gave me the gift of pondering how He was in control of everything. He gave me this peace for almost an hour that April morning. . . only five days before. 

Future Freeze Frames

God even gives us the ability to create freeze frames that have not actually happened…our imagination. While we often lessen this ability as we develop past childhood, these imagined freeze frames are helpful. During my mom’s two year journey toward death, I often created pictures of us walking over a big bridge. While her steps were only allowed to travel one-way, I took great comfort in this visual. What a treasure to walk with her as she traveled onward to her final home with God. 

The most beautiful future freeze frame is when Christ receives us home. We can imagine that day, when we too will walk with him in eternity, just as Mom is doing now.

2021 Failed attempt

(Previously published in Good News Magazine Dalton edition Aug. 2021)

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Redemption: Laundry -By Karla

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Comfy Clothes in need of Laundry

Teachers see different students’ personalities, learning styles, and unique needs. Often students will wear the same hoodie for several days in a row. No big deal, it’s like a jacket–and we all wear jackets many times before we throw them into the laundry. However, one of my students once wore a soiled pull-over the entire week. In addition, by Friday she began to smell as badly as her clothes looked. While I prayed for her and her home situation, I also submitted her name to the counselor and social worker. 

Our Dirty Souls in need of Cleaning

Without Christ, our souls are a matted mess like that of my student’s hoodie, in need of the laundry. No amount of laundry detergent, stain-free spray, good intentions, or good deeds will remove our sins. Only submitting ourselves to God and accepting His sovereignty over our lives can detangle and cleanse our corrupt nature. 

Cleansing My Soul

Many years ago at age eleven, I walked forward in church and asked God to be my Savior. I prayed the sinner’s prayer, and God entered my heart. God’s Good News is that simple!

While it is not the words that saved me, my salvation emerged from God’s grace. When we stand In the moment of accepting His precious gift, we can be speechlessly in awe! The sinner’s prayer gives us some meaningful words to begin our relationship with Him. 

For years, I walked in the knowledge that I would go to Heaven when I died. I often made different choices than that of my classmates. I tried to be kind to others, even when they mistreated me at times. Was I perfect? Heavens, no.

Growing up, perhaps I was making better choices than some of my classmates, but I was far from living my life in God’s will. On Sundays I was more intuned with God’s desires, but during the week my habits were still present; my selfish thinking was still self-serving. At best, I was striving to behave a little above my peers’ standards. But I was not asking God to show me His ways. 

Keeping Myself Clean

Somewhere along the clothesline of life, it occurred to me that His ways are not my ways and my ways are not His ways. I realized I was wearing dirty clothes over a soul that I had asked God to continuously cleanse. What a dishonor to My King, who made such a sacrifice for me. 

Over the years, I have grown as a Christian. Most days I start my mornings in fellowship with God. Then sometimes during the day I put the dirty hoodie back on as I slip back into my old ways. God’s abounding grace gives me the opportunity to remove the hoodie and let him wash it clean. But I must take it off and hand it over by repentance. 

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Isaiah 55: 8-9 (ESV)

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Mom: As Mom Would Say -By Karla

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Years ago, I was in church listening to a sermon when a pastor told a story about a woman who was cooking a roast. She cut the meat into two pieces and placed each in separate roasting pans. Year after year, the lady did the same thing. One holiday, the husband said, “Honey, why do you cut the meat into two piece? Does it make it cook differently?” The wife replied, “Ummm, I don’t know why I do that. Mom did it, so I’m sure there’s a reason.” Shortly after their conversation, the lady phoned her mom. Her mom paused; then she answered with the same sort of wording. “Ummm, I just did it because mom did it that way.” Luckily for the mom, her mom was still living. Out of curiosity, she called her ninety-two-year-old mama. Her mom kind of laughed, “Because I did not have a pan large enough.”

Mom and Music

That story cracks me. It is so true. The older I get the more I seem to say and do the things Mom did. I love music just like Mom. In the mornings, it peps me up while I am getting ready for my day. I listen to it often during my planning period at school, which helps me accomplish more. When I get home from a long day, music helps me concentrate to grade papers or get a second wind to clean my house. At night, I commonly set the timer on my Pandora app, so I can settle to fall asleep with my instrumental praise.

I can so recall Mom stating, “Girls, turn down the radio, or just leave it off please. I need some peace and quiet.” Just like Mom did, there are days I am driving home from school when I say the very same thing to myself.

Mom’s Sayings

At school, I have grown from the young and hip creative teacher to much more of a grandmotherly figure over the years. I seek every opportunity to affirm and brag on their accomplishments both large and small. However, I also fuss at them when they do wrong. I strive for my students to know that I love them unconditionally. In the instant world youngsters live in today, having to work for something is foreign to them at times. I have refrained from letting loose with Mom’s words, “I’m gonna pinch your head off!” But in recent years, I have found my lips mouthing her familiar words, “Don’t just sit there like a bump on a log. My mom would’ve looked at you and said, ‘Am I gonna have to lite a fire under your bottom?’” The kids seem to like my mom’s little country sayings, motivating them to get busy.

Mom’s Advice

Mom passed over fifteen years ago. During this time, many things have happened in my life that I wish she had been here to help me through. When I get into a mood, Mom’s words invade my mind. I have even said aloud, “Yes, Mom, I’m having pity party. And yes, Mom, I remember what you taught me. A pity party should only last so long! Don’t invite too many people because not many people really want to come. I remember that my sweet friends who are willingly to come don’t want to stay long.” So, I rest, and even pout a bit. Often I call Donna to vent or cry. Then I get a hold of myself to move forward little by little.

The other day my sisters and I were in a group text trying to encourage each other. I stated that God does not desire us to live with guilt after we have repented to the Lord. Continuing, I reminded the four of us that God does not want us to be trapped in a place that Satan wants to confine us, but to move forward to do His will. For a short moment, one sister commented on how wise I was. Another sister quickly deflated my pride stating my insight came from Mom. We had all heard her say so many times, “Satan, get behind me!” I just died laughing when that sister texted those words. I replied with my thoughts, “I used to think that Mom was kind of crazy when she declared those words, but the longer I live, the more I profess those words myself.” Mom was the wise one! We just try to follow in her footsteps.

I once saw a tote bag that said, “Sometimes, I open my mouth and my mother comes out.” I started to buy it because it is so very true and it cracked me up. However, I could hear Mom saying, “Just window shop, Karla, you have enough bags already.”

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Change: Smiles, Not Miles — By Donna

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I don’t like change. I am a creature of habit, a tradition lover, and very sentimental. But, it seems the older I get, the more change I must endure. Life seems to be changing at a faster rate than before. Change can be exciting or difficult, but what it cannot be is…avoided. It will happen. The verb definitions of change are to make different or to substitute with something else. Whether something is modified or replaced, it has an affect on us, and anything that affects us affects those around us. 

Types of Change

Exciting changes, that you know are coming, bring happiness and adventure. Events like buying a house, starting a new job, or adopting a pet are changes you chose to make, possibly even prayed for. You are able to take the steps necessary to make the transition as smooth as possible.

Difficult change, big or small, often brings worry. But when you have the hindsight, you have time to prepare. You are able to get ready physically, emotionally, spiritually and mentally.

I am a processor. If something is altered, for the good or for the bad, I must think things through. With expected change, I am able to pray about it, prepare myself for emotions that may be coming and set my mind to a positive vibe.

Other times change comes out of nowhere. It is like a Jack-In-The-Box. You are going along listening to a merry tune and POP; it’s in your face. If it is a good change, we are all about it. But if it is an undesired change, you are unable to brace yourself. It is like an unwelcome demand for something you aren’t ready for. We don’t like these modifications because they are hard, uncomfortable, painful, or humbling.

When negative, unexpected change occurs, we often react in a not-so-good way. We may wallow in self-pity, lash out against others or God, or become apathetic.Don’t! Don’t cling to what cannot be recovered. Don’t focus on the loss involved. Instead focus on the good memories before the change.

Smiles, not Miles

My son, Tucker drives a large Ford F250 that has a lift. I drive a small SUV. Recently, he was going somewhere and I offered for him to take my car. He is known for his sense of humor, so I wasn’t surprised at this response. “That car is embarrassing. It’s so close to the ground it’s like driving a go-cart down the road.” My reply was, “Well, it gets great gas mileage.” He replied, “It’s not about the miles, it’s about the smiles.”

That phrase is so true in life. Rather than focus on the miles of disappointing change we have all faced in life, focus on the smiles that happened on the way. When you do reflect on the way things used to be, keep your mind set on the happy moments.

The year 2021 will be filled with change: expected and unexpected, good and bad. No matter what each day brings, God will show you the way.

“Whether you turn to the right or turn to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, ‘This is the way; walk in it.’” Isaiah 30:21 (NIV)

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