The Power of Words. -By Donna

During the summer, being a teacher, I get the luxury of sleeping late, or just lying there enjoying the birds chirping. This morning around 7:40 my phone “beeped” the familiar text sound. My first thought was, “who in the world is texting me this early?” (This  is funny because the normal school early for me is 5:30 am.)  I rolled over, slid on my reading glasses, and pulled up the text.  It read, “Good Morning. Have a great summer! I appreciate you!” Then it was followed by this picture. I smiled. And honestly, it made me feel good about myself. A simple compliment can do wonders for someone who needs it. Words are so important. Maybe As parents, we should ask ourselves, when was the last time we complimented our children?  

The Words of Parents

Being a parent is very difficult, no matter what stage our child is in. We become overwhelmed, tired, and frustrated. At times, children can be little pests, annoying, and a pain in the derriere! I’m speaking as a parent and a teacher. BUT, please be aware of the words you say to your child. I am not saying scolding a child is wrong. Children need that. My mama was strict! She would not hesitate to speak firmly to one of us three, her nieces or nephews, or our friends if she felt necessary. If you were in our home, you were fair game! But never in those moments did she ever speak rudely, or say things that made us feel unloved or unwanted. 

“I Can’t Stand Y’all”

 In the Dollar General store recently, a mother came in with her two children, around ages 8 and 4. Walking in the door she complained, “Just shut up! Y’all drive me crazy. I can’t stand ya’ll. Y’all are gonna kill me.” I thought to myself. Lady, what if God decided to take you later today? Do you know what that 10-year-old might think? The entire time in the store, she constantly badgered them with negativity. I have no idea what happened in the car. Maybe it was the usual brother sister picking, but those words she was speaking!

Yesterday in Kroger, I passed a mother of four, as she yelled, “Jesus, please somebody take these children away.” Even when I was two isles over I could still hear her screaming at her kids. I’m sure she was overwhelmed with life. However, on the next isle I passed a couple pushing a girl, about age 6, in a wheelchair. She was clearly severely disabled. I wondered if they had heard the yelling of the mother who was taking for granted her four seemingly healthy children. Many of the things she was yelling about were simple things I’m sure they wished their child could do:  ASKING for the blue Kool-Aid, PICKING up the box of cookies, and WALKING too slow.

How Would You Feel?

How does it make you feel when a boss, spouse, friend, or child compliments you? Good? But how would it make you feel if you made a mistake and they went on and on and on…

Supervisor:  Ms. Low, you forgot to turn in the invoice.

Ms. Low:  Oops, I just got busy and…

Supervisor:  I don’t care. Why are you always screwing up. Why can’t you be like Ms. High. She is always good. You are good for nothing. I wish I had never hired you. You will never change.

The above scenario sounds sort of ridiculous, but that is exactly the way many children are spoken too. By all means, correct your child, fuss at them, and discipline them. But be aware of degrading, humiliating words that can make them feel “inadequate” and “unloved.” Negative comments chip away at a child’s self-worth. Lift up your child with positive words, and give someone a compliment today!

“Kind words are like honey-sweet to the taste and good for your health.”  Proverbs 16:24

–Donna

 

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Misunderstanding: Perspective -By Karla

The Walking Company in the Chattanooga mall is where I buy my shoes since my foot accident several years ago.  The girls had given me a gift card for Christmas, so we decided to go shopping. They enjoy helping me be stylish while aiding my bum-foot.

Shoots Fired

When the noise rang out, the sales woman was in the floor assisting me. Looking up, we saw sparks flying, and a mother hunched over her daughter attempting to shield her. Someone said the word “shooting” as the numerous people outside the stores began running and screaming in chaos. The sales rep, who was assisting me, jumped and joined the other two sales ladies, springing into action. Two workers scurried us toward the back of the store while the other ran and drug  the metal gate  .

Then she frantically flung herself into the stockroom and began crying. By this time, the girls and I had gathered in between mounds of shoeboxes. Holding their hands, I began praying. ”Lord, please, help us. Keep us safe from the shots. God, be with those hurt.” Imagining blood, I added, “I can’t imagine how scared they must be! God, as policemen, ambulances, and first responders enter, protect them–“

Lindsey interrupted softly, “It’s ok. You can join us.” I paused while two of ladies entered into our circle. I continued praying while the other girl bawled in fear.

“Shhh, I hear footsteps. I think we should be quiet,” someone said.

At this time, I crawled to sit with the girl, who was still crying. Her arms were wrapped around her legs, and she had them pulled tightly toward her chest. I did not stop to think if I should ask her for permission to pray with her. I just did. Placing my hand on her kneecap, I asked, “God to give us peace,” reminding us both that God was in our midst.

Rachel whispered, “I think we should move away from this door, Mom. If someone shoots from the mall entrance of this store, we would be in the direct line of a bullet.”

Moving to an interior staircase that lead up to a storage loft, six people sat forming a quick bond during a very scary crisis. I then recalled seeing the sparks and thought a bullet must had ricocheted off something metal.

The workers shared their fears and stories from the shooting incident that occurred outside the mall on Black Friday. Within the next fifteen minutes, officials deemed it safe to move, though we were still unknown of the results. Everyone moved hesitantly.

As we paid for my shoes, we watched people in the corridors. One family, who had older teenagers, reunited by holding each other. Frightened, I thought about how the girls and I could have been in separate stores when horrid happening occurred. The three of us stood there, watching the family hold on to each other, trying to comfort one another.

Honestly, since our legs a bit like Jell-O from the stress, we decided our shopping adventure was over. 


That evening the news shared details: “Fireworks set off inside Hamilton Place Mall; three injured trying to escape”.

The news had a very different perspective than mine. There were more injured.

The three of us were injured. Not physically, but emotionally.

On the way home, we had talked about how scary our morning had been. We realized a newly-found fear we had. How to be anywhere that holds a large number of people or to walk around in open places where you cannot hide. What a difficult decision store workers might have to make: let someone run inside for safety or keep them out in fear they might had been involved or could not secure store fast enough.

While hiding in the stairwell of the storage room, one of the workers called her mom. The mom’s interpretation was clear, “Quit and come home. The mall is just too dangerous!” Her mom was even affected by the situation. 

The stores were injured in their sales yesterday as well. Customers were vacating the mall by the masses. By the time we reached the doors to exit for our car, the stores were nearly empty.

I do not understand the perspective of the teenagers, who thought it might be a good idea to throw fireworks, causing a distraction so they could shoplift.

Some days I do not understand the world in which we live. I strive to remember, “The Lord is  refuse for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know your name trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.” Psalms 9:9-10

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